May 26, 2011
My novel DWEEB, silly as it is, touches on some weighty issues regarding education. Specifically, the role of standardized tests in the lives of the squeaky-voiced, acne-plagued future of our fair land. Look at the cover, for crying out loud. It’s a scantron sheet! I’ve never claimed to have any answers, however. Because I’m far from an expert. I only know that the anxiety surrounding tests can affect administrators, teachers and students alike, and undoubtedly shapes the lives of most of the people who walk through the front doors of our school houses these days.
Last week I walked through the doors of Manhattan Charter School on the Lower East Side of New York City. It was my first experience with a charter school, aside from watching Waiting For Superman and 60 Minutes. What I found there was what an author hopes to find in any school:
Welcoming, bright and hard-working teachers and staff, as well as enthusiastic, curious and friendly young readers. I was especially honored to meet Ms. Bennett’s 4th grade class. They had all read DWEEB but had held off on reading the last chapter until my arrival. I sat down and read it to them, then we talked about it book club style. Their questions were both astute and flattering. Many were curious about the possibility of a movie (Hear that, Hollywood? I personally think the talky, nerdy hi-jinks might be a good fit for Richard Linklater). They were all bummed to hear they’d have to wait until September for The Only Ones. To top it all off, they had drawn life-size pictures of each of the main characters from DWEEB, and those fantastic works of art are displayed in the hall of their school. Some of the pictures might have even have been larger than life-size. I believe the term is heroic-size.
I didn’t come away from the day with the answers to our educational woes, nor did I formulate a rock-hard opinion on the importance of standardized tests. But I did walk out of that building knowing that 9-12 year-old kids who get excited about books–ones they’ve read, ones they want to read–are kids who care deeply about their education, even if they’re not quick to admit it.
The Manhattan Charter School likes to “celebrate curious minds,” and I can’t think of a better thing to celebrate. Don’t listen to the old adage. Curiosity doesn’t kill cats. Cars, old-age and rabid raccoons do. And don’t ever think that success, in the traditional mold of wealth and prestige, means anything without a healthy diet of curiosity. You can’t possibly be happy and you can’t possibly change the lives of others for the better if you aren’t curious. The teachers and kids of Manhattan Charter School reminded me of that.
It’s my job to keep myself curious. I can’t fall into the trap of complacency. My writing will suffer and kids, curious and clever, will toss the books aside and say “well, if this is as good as education gets, then lobotomize me and book me a train to Lazytown, because I’m out.” Well, maybe they won’t say that, but they might put a check-mark in the “reading is lame” column of their brain and their curiosity will dim just a little, and to me, that’s much worse then them dropping a few percentiles on a test. That’s a stand I’m more than willing to take.
No Comments | Posted by Aaron under Books, DWEEB, News and Events, School Visits | Bookmark or Share
April 15, 2011
When I was young books were paperbacks. I knew of hardcovers of course, but I rarely ever read a book in hardcover. I thumbed through cheaply produced light-weight volumes that would split at the seams by the time I’d gotten to the final chapters. That was fine by me. I wasn’t a collector of objects. I was a collector of stories and I shelved them in my mind.
Many of the paperbacks I read were published under the Yearling imprint. According to their web site Yearling has published beloved authors such as “Judy Blume, Christopher Paul Curtis, Patricia Reilly Giff, Norton Juster, Madeleine L’Engle, Lois Lowry, Gary Paulsen, Philip Pullman, Louis Sachar and classic characters such as Encyclopedia Brown, Harriet the Spy, Nate the Great, and Sammy Keyes.”
And now me. That’s right, the DWEEB paperback now appears under the Yearling banner. An honor, to say the least.
It’s during moments like these when a fellow has to ground himself. Heck, I’m no Judy Blume. I’m not even Judy Tenuta! (If there’s a single kid out there who knows who Judy Tenuta is, I salute you, and fear for you). I’ve written a couple of books and they’ve had very little effect on the global economy. Believe it or not I’ve even fallen victim some negative reviews. Some authors say they don’t pay attention to reviews (some authors are liars). I pay attention to reviews because they often contain helpful advice. Especially the negative ones, even if they’re draped in snark.
That’s not to say there aren’t negative reviews that are basically useless. I did receive one review that featured no redeeming qualities whatsoever. It was sent to me in a box containing a collage of photographs depicting the reviewers showing their disdain for DWEEB, along with the warm corpse of an ivory-billed woodpecker. The review was so cruel that I had to be put on bed-rest for a fortnight after reading it. I contemplated burning it, but now that I have some perspective, I know it’s better to just get such things out in the open. Yes, to keep me humble, but also to remind me that no matter what I do, not everyone will be a fan. Nor should everyone be. So, without further ado, the worst review I have ever received.
Dear author of DWEEB,
We use the word “author” loosely. We have seen vomit better crafted than this alleged novel. The word novel comes from the Latin “novus,” which translates as “new.” Well, the book was certainly new, but only because we couldn’t find it at a used book store. We doubt anyone else has bought such derivitive dreck. Perhaps the CIA has. They probably read it down at Gitmo, causing the inmates to holler, “I’ll tell you anything! The cave where Osama is hiding! The meaning of Mulholland Drive! Just stop reading! You can even put the Creed CD back on. That’s heaven compared to this!”
We would love to list all the reasons why we hated this book, but it would be like listing all the reasons why we think Hitler would make a terrible babysitter. It would take eons. That’s right, it’s only paragraph two of our review and we’ve already compared you to Hitler. It’s actually the closest thing to a compliment we’re going to give you. Heck, at least Mein Kampf earned back its advance.
After reading your book we considered bringing in a priest to exorcise the blasphemous trash. Obviously the pages are simply lousy with demons. The pope suggested we lock it in a trunk filled with holy water, rosaries and the shroud of Turin, and bury it fifty feet deep beneath the Sistine Chapel. “Torch it and throw in the Ganges,” others told us. Nerds advised us to call in Elijah Wood and have the shameless little imp toss it into Krakatoa. But we figured those courses of action had the potential to set off chain reactions, causing blessed springs and powerful volcanos around the world to spew forth mixed metaphors, paper-thin protagonists and overwrought third acts.
We thought the best option was to set out into the southern swamps and hunt down the elusive ivory-billed woodpecker. For years, people thought this beautiful and majestic bird was extinct. Well, it wasn’t. At least, not until Tuesday. We found the last one and we broke its neck. Why would we do such a thing?
1. To prove that your writing is responsible for the extinction of a species.
2. To put the poor little guy out of his misery. When we read that bird the first chapter of your book, he promptly flew into a tree and pecked out a short message in morse code. “Goodbye Cruel World. You Have Finally Bested Me.”
The evidence is enclosed. We hope it makes you rethink your dastardly ways. However, we suspect it will just turn your black, black blood and your black, black heart even blacker. So we will keep our copy of your book and we will take to the streets with it. We will speak at schools and libraries and community centers and religious monuments and we will warn the world about your soullessness. And when Kirkus reviews your next book, we will send them a picture of that woodpecker and a petition signed by millions proclaiming:
Aaron Starmer Must Be Stopped.
Sincerely,
Your nephews Will and Jacob
1 Comment | Posted by Aaron under BEST OF, Books, DWEEB, News and Events | Bookmark or Share
March 4, 2011
This week I had the distinct pleasure of visiting two schools in Washington Township, NJ, a charming little community in the northwest corner of the state. According to Wikipedia, Jean Shepherd, author of The Christmas Story, once lived here. I didn’t see any leg lamps in any windows or kids with tongues stuck to poles, so I can’t confirm that fact. But I can confirm that the kids of Port Colden Elementary and Brass Castle Elementary schools are a welcoming and inquisitive bunch, and about the best audience an author could imagine. It was Dr. Seuss’s birthday, otherwise known as Read Across America Day, and the kids were decked out in homemade shirts and hats celebrating the late, great master of Whos, and Yooks, and Sneeches, and Zooks. Too many people complain about how kids have no attention spans. Not so with this crew. They sat quietly and cross-legged in the Auditoria (or perhaps it was a Cafetorium?) and locked eyes with me as I gave a presentation on writing. I could see what they were thinking:
“Entertain us, old man. Tell us something we don’t know, because we are culturally refined and our intellects are not to be trifled with.”
When I finished, they hounded me with brilliant questions. I hope I lived up to their expectations. Don’t believe it? Proof lies in this collection of photos from the kind folks at Lehigh Valley’s Express Times. My favorite question?
“What happens at the end of The Only Ones?”
I informed the young man (probably a junior blogger angling for an unprecedented scoop) that I can’t give out such spoilers, especially since the book doesn’t hit shelves for another six months. But I respect his guts and his willingness to get right to the point. To reward that, I am offering a teaser. The Only Ones ends like this:
…him.”
Intrigued?
5 Comments | Posted by Aaron under Books, Childhood, DWEEB, News and Events, School Visits, The Only Ones | Bookmark or Share
September 28, 2010
A quick post to announce an appearance. I’ll be popping into Collingswood, NJ this Saturday, from 10AM-4PM, for their annual book festival. Never been to Collingswood (a town in South Jersey, just outside of Philly), but this seems like a great little event (click on the logo above for more details!). I didn’t sign up early enough to be one of the authors giving a talk or sitting in on a panel, but I’ll have a table among the exhibitors – booth 87 to be exact. I’ll be selling and signing copies of DWEEB and chatting folks up about my new book, which has recently been retitled The Only Ones and is due on shelves in less than a year. Perhaps I’ll even have a few surprises up my sleeve. So if you’re from New Jersey or Philadelphia or Delaware, or heck, even if you’re from Bhutan, come on by. Seeing you will be a treat. Until then…
2 Comments | Posted by Aaron under DWEEB, News and Events | Bookmark or Share
