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The Only
                Ones
The Only Ones

"Call it coincidence, call it fate. This is the place you come. There's nowhere else. There's no one else. This is the entire world."

These words welcome Martin Maple to the village of Xibalba. Like the other children who've journeyed there, he faces an awful truth.

He was forgotten.

When families and friends all disappeared one afternoon, these were the only ones left behind. There's Darla, who drives a monster truck, Felix, who uses string and wood to rebuild the Internet, Lane, who crafts elaborate contraptions, and nearly forty others, each equally brilliant and peculiar.

Inspired by the prophesies of a mysterious boy who talks to animals, Martin believes he can reunite them with their loved ones. But believing and knowing are two different things, as he soon discovers with the push of a button, flip of a switch, turn of a dial...

"One of the most unique, captivating books I've ever read. I was completely pulled into its pages and they never let me go." - James Dashner, bestselling author of The Maze Runner

"Both literary and engaging, this is the kind of book readers will want to return to for new discoveries." - Kirkus Reviews

"Starmer’s science-fiction fable ultimately becomes gripping and haunting as the characters explore matters of faith, leadership, and responsibility, culminating in a reflective, bittersweet conclusion worthy of Neil Gaiman." - School Library Journal

"Starmer weaves an enchanting tale full of mystery and magic. The novel includes moments of gentle humor that contrast with despair and sadness, creating a perfect balance." - VOYA Magazine

A Junior Library Guild Fall 2011 selection.

The Only Ones is published by Delacorte Press, a division of Random House. It is represented by Elisabeth Weed at Weed Literary.

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September 13, 2011


Dweeb:
                Burgers, Beasts and Brainwashed Bullies
Dweeb: Burgers, Beasts, and Brainwashed Bullies

Imagine you're 10. If you are actually 10, then imagine you're you. What would you like to read about?

Monkeys? Sure. Wizards? Makes sense. Ponies? I guess that's possible, but I wouldn't go telling people that. How about this? Five flawed but loveable loners become embroiled in a vast conspiracy involving fast food, standarized testing and growling creatures. Sound like a yawn? Okay. What if I said an evil vice principal imprisons those five loners in the basement of their junior high school and they have to use all their nerdish skills to break out?

Still not doing it for you? Well it did it for School Library Journal. They proclaimed that "this fun romp is a break from the often-heavy realistic fiction that is omnipresent in today's literature." Got it? It's fun. A romp, for crying out loud! An enemy of omnipresence.

Cynics are still shaking their heads. "School Library Journal?" they're saying. "That old rag." To them, I wag a finger, then point it to the unimpeachable The Bulletin of the Center for Children's Books. This is what they said. "The themes will all resonate; from the anxiety over high-stakes testing to the unfairness of detention-loving vice principals to the hotness of school nurses, this whacks all of the eighth-grade nerd-boy moles...Give this to nerds and non-nerds who are just beginning to be a little bit cynical about their schooling experience." The BCCB suffers no fools. When they say something is for cynics, it's not advice. It's an order. Buy it. Give it. Buy it again.

DWEEB is published by Delacorte Press, a division of Random House. It is represented by Elisabeth Weed at Weed Literary.

Order now from Amazon.com, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound

October 13, 2009


Mountain Man Dance Moves, The McSweeney's Book of Lists

There are literally hundreds of good reasons to read this book from the incorrigible scamps at McSweeney's.  There are two great ones.

Buried in the unicorn humor and hipster posturing are my lists about Ted Nugent and Jan Michael Vincent. They will forever change the way you look at muskrats and pyramids.

Give those McSweeney's folks some credit. They find and foster young, idiosyncratic talent, and while you may not recognize most of the names in this slight and slightly silly book, I guarantee that more than a couple will become future literary luminaries. And, as an added bonus, I present you with something not featured in the book, my list about Beetle Bailey. It's best read with a cup of postum and an imagination.

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September 12, 2006

Mountain
                  Man Dance Moves
Best in Tent Camping, New York State

If you've always had a roof above you, if you've always paid the rent. If you've never even set foot inside a tent...

If you can't build a fire to save your life. If you've lied about being the outdoor type. Then you probably shouldn't get this book. Otherwise, grab yourself a copy, stuff it in your backpack and head over to the Empire State. My wife Cate, my brother Tim, and yours truly will be your guides to the finest places to pitch a tent. Because one thing's for sure. You're not crashing on our couches.

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April 1, 2007

Best in Tent Camping - New York State